The Hardest Hit...

A crushing blow, that's what I felt. Like being pounded in the abdomen with a steel beam, I knew my ribs had broken, but that didn't compare to the pain in the back of my head I felt after slamming into the bookshelf in Carlisle's office.. I felt the pain, I understood the pain after what I'd just hit, but where it came from was harder to figure out, it happened so quickly, it was almost inconceivable..
The only indication it was coming was a gust of chilly wind against my skin, and then my mother, had shoved me back using the palms of her hands against my stomach, knocking me away from attacking Carlisle..
I wanted to be angry with her but I knew it was necessary, if I'd hurt Carlisle, or he'd hurt me I'd never forgive myself for his pain and everyone elses.. I knew she loved me and she had to do it, but it was harder to explain that to Jake.. His primal instinct cut in and the office erupted to ear shattering howls and screeches.. All I could think was "What have I done?"
My whole world had been turned upside down, all due to my bitterness surrounding Mason's health.. There was a better way to deal with this, I just lost control and I had to fix it..
I struggled to stand, finding it difficult, I watched as my mother and father circled Jake, everyone clearly upset, no one giving in first, I had to put myself in the middle of them, I knew no matter what none of them would hurt me and if I could stop them for just a second, long enough to snap back and realize that by hurting each other, my world as we know it would end...
But, someone beat me to it, two someones actually.. Seth and Leah..
Seth stepped in the middle of the circle, letting out a deafening growl, as Leah held Mason in her arms, she cooed to him and within moments he had calmed, the room had grown quiet, Jake had transformed back and I gingerly laid my hand against Elizabeth's stomach, she looked startled, clearly.. her eyes taking everything in and all I felt was shame, for what I'd done.. Leah stepped forward..
"This is absolutely ridiculous and unnecessary, what happened here today should have never taken place, you are a family, that means you're there through the thick and thin.. no matter what..." she said, "There are always going to be challenges, everyone knew this going into it, but none of that is important, the only thing that matters now are these two precious beings, and you all need to pull it together for them, this cannot happen again.."
"I agree" I said, "And I'm sorry." I walked over to Leah and held out my arms for Mason, she reluctantly handed him over, I looked at the precious baby wrapped in a blue blanket and wondered how this had all transpired, his future was filled with what ifs, as well as Elizabeth's... but I would be there..calmly.. every step of the way..
"You are my life now, " I whispered kissing his forehead.. As Jake walked towards me holding Elizabeth, "No matter what." he agreed.
And from that day forward we decided to lift the "what ifs" to God, we were first and foremost their parents, and we were taking that job very seriously...

As Always With Love Renesmee Cullen-Black as interpreted by Elizabeth Queen